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I had my 12-week ultrasound at 3:30 this afternoon.
I spent all last night and all today trying to pray that everything would be okay, and that if it was not, that God would give me strength to deal with it. Honestly, as with the first two ultrasounds, I was 99.999% sure there would be a problem, and I was having massive anxiety/panic about it. One minute, I was positive the baby was dead (I had tried for 30 minutes looking for the heartbeat on a home Doppler yesterday), the next minute, I was positive the baby had Trisomy 18... and on and on and on.
I was nervous as it's possible to be going into the ultrasound, since I've never made it this far in a pregnancy and didn't know why this time should be any different... so, I was completely STUNNED and AMAZED when the screen right away showed my little baby taking the cutest gigantic leap, pushing off the uterine "floor"! We watched her play with her little hands for a moment, then settle into sucking her thumb.
I'm glad I was lying down for this or I would have collapsed into a puddle on the floor!! 
The tech measured the heartbeat (it was in the 160's) and we got to hear it (the first time DH has heard it rather than just seeing it) and took measurements. Our 12w1d baby is measuring 12w4d (and of course that's not even counting her legs -- and it looked like she has her Daddy's long legs!). I asked the tech if she had a gender guess at this point, and she said, "Well, I don't see anything sticking out, so my guess at this point would be a girl... but don't hold me to that!" DH and I beamed at each other... our hunch for a while has been that it's a girl, and several family members are sure of it too, so we're going with "girl" until proven otherwise! (GUPO?!)
The NT measurements were perfect... when the doctor came in to explain the measurements and what they indicate, he said, "I realize we have to wait for the bloodwork to come back, but I can tell you right now that based on the NT measurement and the fact that we see the nose bone, everything looks as good as it possibly could... I don't see anything that indicates any problems." Of course, even if our baby had a trisomy, we would love her as much as the Lord allowed us to have her... but it was SO GOOD to hear that (and I had been watching the NT measurements and had already breathed a huge sigh of relief)! I tearfully thanked the doctor for completely making my day, and he said, "I just give you the facts, that's all!"
After the doctor left the room, I came very close to sobbing right then and there... I really thought, and still think, that I must be dreaming. Having a healthy, living, active baby at 12 weeks is something that happens for other women, not me. "Thankful" is such a puny word to describe the swell of overwhelming joy and gratitude I feel that God has let us have this precious child for this long. Thank you, precious Lord, for giving us this miracle!! Please make me worthy to be this child's mother!!
I spent all last night and all today trying to pray that everything would be okay, and that if it was not, that God would give me strength to deal with it. Honestly, as with the first two ultrasounds, I was 99.999% sure there would be a problem, and I was having massive anxiety/panic about it. One minute, I was positive the baby was dead (I had tried for 30 minutes looking for the heartbeat on a home Doppler yesterday), the next minute, I was positive the baby had Trisomy 18... and on and on and on.
I was nervous as it's possible to be going into the ultrasound, since I've never made it this far in a pregnancy and didn't know why this time should be any different... so, I was completely STUNNED and AMAZED when the screen right away showed my little baby taking the cutest gigantic leap, pushing off the uterine "floor"! We watched her play with her little hands for a moment, then settle into sucking her thumb.
I'm glad I was lying down for this or I would have collapsed into a puddle on the floor!! The tech measured the heartbeat (it was in the 160's) and we got to hear it (the first time DH has heard it rather than just seeing it) and took measurements. Our 12w1d baby is measuring 12w4d (and of course that's not even counting her legs -- and it looked like she has her Daddy's long legs!).
I asked the tech if she had a gender guess at this point, and she said, "Well, I don't see anything sticking out, so my guess at this point would be a girl... but don't hold me to that!" DH and I beamed at each other... our hunch for a while has been that it's a girl, and several family members are sure of it too, so we're going with "girl" until proven otherwise! (GUPO?!)The NT measurements were perfect... when the doctor came in to explain the measurements and what they indicate, he said, "I realize we have to wait for the bloodwork to come back, but I can tell you right now that based on the NT measurement and the fact that we see the nose bone, everything looks as good as it possibly could... I don't see anything that indicates any problems." Of course, even if our baby had a trisomy, we would love her as much as the Lord allowed us to have her... but it was SO GOOD to hear that (and I had been watching the NT measurements and had already breathed a huge sigh of relief)! I tearfully thanked the doctor for completely making my day, and he said, "I just give you the facts, that's all!"
After the doctor left the room, I came very close to sobbing right then and there... I really thought, and still think, that I must be dreaming. Having a healthy, living, active baby at 12 weeks is something that happens for other women, not me. "Thankful" is such a puny word to describe the swell of overwhelming joy and gratitude I feel that God has let us have this precious child for this long. Thank you, precious Lord, for giving us this miracle!! Please make me worthy to be this child's mother!!
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